Stop trying to manage your practice.

Remember when I told myself this last summer? To stop thinking so much. Well, turns out close to a year later and I'm still having to force myself to pause and calm down. I don't quite mean in the busy sense, I'm always going to be busy I've accepted that is my personal nature. Unless I'm utterly exhausted or in the company of friends I don't like sitting idle 85% of the time. Though lately I have taken the time to understand that slowing down isn't a set back, rather a necessity. Taking the time to order one more round of beers while catching up with someone, or just sitting in that chair in your living room and finishing a book because 'cmon you only have 10 more pages to go...those are important as well.

I recently started practicing yoga, not as regularly as I would like due to that busy schedule I just mentioned, but still enough to start to really appreciate it. I took a new class this week that was mainly focused on breathing and meditation. It's tough for me to get out of my head sometimes, my mind seems to wander very easily and I have a tendency to daydream like no other, but I actually really enjoyed it. The one thing the instructor kept saying that really stuck with me was to "stop trying to manage your practice" and man, was she was right about that. I found myself in poses where I thought "if I have to sit like this for 5 more seconds I am going to collapse into a crumpled ball of nothingness onto this mat right here" however, eventually I realized I needed to listen to what she was trying to tell me. The more you thought about what you were doing the harder it was, you could actually concentrate too hard on it. If you just focused on your breathing you really could make your body do some amazing things, almost as second nature. Now, I'm not literally going to walk around all day paying attention to the breathe flowing in an out of my body, but when it clicked with me in that yoga studio it was an amazing thing to realize. Just, stop thinking about it.

I can't help but feel this idea is a recurring theme in my life lately, maybe someone is trying to tell me something. Almost a year out of college and wondering what I'm "doing" is this silly idea that I know I get hung up on a lot. It is in a way comforting knowing for a fact I'm not the only one. "What if this is the wrong decision? What do I do? Who am I?" These are questions that 20-somethings everywhere struggle with daily. Heck, these are questions that people, no matter their age, sex, geographical location, deal with every hour, every day, all over the world. Well the thing is, this is just life. You're going to wake up in the morning and have the day to do with it what you chose. And maybe some of us need to just stop thinking so much. Stop trying to manage your practice, and with that, stop trying to manage every single aspect of your life.

Someone I really care about recently just told me that nothing in life is certain. How many times has someone told you that? He's right though you know, nothing is. And yet, if you let that fear of uncertainty plague you, you'll asking yourself those decision-making questions until you're blue in the face and terrified to leave your apartment. I think for me it was time for that reminder, to stop thinking, to take a few more risks, to stop trying to make everything work out in this text book way. Life is uncertain, yes, but it is so much more wonderful that way.

When life gives you lemons

Make lemonade. Or lemon blueberry muffins. Or cut them open, enjoy the smell and pretend it's summertime.

The point is, everyone has days or weeks or months that don't go well. Years even sometimes. But usually, dwelling on the sadness and frustration never does any good. And sometimes you need to remember you do things that seem tough now but only make your life better in the long run. So instead I want to share a few things that always seem to bring a smile to my face lately...

E-mails from my stepdad. All the way from Afghanistan.

The fact I've started drinking bottled rootbeer almost regularly.

Catching up with my friends from across the country. Thank goodness for internet.

Live music. (and the Thursday night crew I attend those shows with)

And remembering Spring is right around the corner. Bring on the grill outs, beer out of mason jars, ballet flats, and dresses everyday.

Next time you're feeling blue, think about the things that make you smile. Trust me, it helps.

unexpected messages

i could pipe messages on cupcakes all day, everyday and be content.
this project is keeping me sane.

ambitions

in the spirit of finally unpacking my new apartment. a list of a few ambitions for this upcoming year...

1. don't stress over things out of my control. (this is a big one!)
2. try not to lose/break all my technological items so often
3. take more photographs
3 1/2.^ that includes film! and get it developed!
4. learn to cook! i'm talking oodles and oodles of recipes. this website will probably become my best friend.
5. keep making more and more art every day.
6. share that art with friends.
7. cross one thing off the "101 small pleasures list" daily!
8. make rhubarb jam
9. start pen-paling with my host moms and my oregon friends.
10. save up for the ultimate summer roadtrip
11. enter at least one show.
12. do wonderful things with the AIGA group
13. get an internship
14. enjoy my last year as a college student! (it's been almost 4 years? really?)
...and the list goes on and on...


on a side note: i had breakfast with pat and my our joanne today, who spent the summer in china! we compared lovely stories of our abroad experiences and it was so nice to catch up. she also gave me this beautiful scarf which i absolutely adore! thanks jojo you're the best.


i'm off to get some work done. then later drinks and appetizers with pat's parents who are visiting for the weekend! have a great saturday night everyone.

thoughts.

this past weekend i went to London for the weekend. it was a crazy busy, no sleep weekend but it was really worth it. the city was so packed and had a great vibe. my favorite parts were the little things about the culture, the design of everything is leagues above the US in a lot of ways. made me appreciate being a designer and an artist. i just finished putting all the pictures on facebook and plan on blogging them in small bits since there are so many.

i did want to post this picture though that I took while we saw a peace sit-in going on. it was amazing to see so many people group together for a cause. also, a lot of people from our group went to belfast for the weekend and hearing about all the conflict going on really got to me. it's trips like studing abroad that open your eyes to the way people can be towards one another, whether it be good or bad. ive learned about the hate that still goes on here today, the conflict between people only due to religion. and then at the same time, i sat at my home-stay families kitchen table, and despite cultural and language barriers, played cards for hours with 5 very different people, from 4 different countries. it goes to show you that as a human race we're very much the same, you and me. i wish everyone would stop and realize that once in a while.

this statement holds true in so many ways.

the next posts will be happier i promise. just been doing a lot of thinking lately.

life begins

"Life begins at the end of your comfort zone" -Neale Donald Walsch. designed by the people at Quotable, a lovely source of words.

saw this today on another blog i follow called design is mine: isn't it lovely. (its wonderful, check it out here) and i couldn't help but feel like its perfectly describing the nerves i've been having about my trip. life is so short, go live every minute of it.

hello hello.

introductions are awkward. and anyone who says they love those first days in class or work when you have to say your name and one surprising fact about yourself to the rest of the room..is crazy.

on that note. my names elyse, im a freshly 21 year old art and design student in grand rapids, mi. i plan to fill this blog with photos, rantings, inspiration, baking excursions, gnome sightings, my creations and agendas. in a few weeks i'll be traveling to dublin, ireland and this will be a way to catalog my adventures over there as well! so join me as i reveal in art, design, cupcakes, and somewhere in between it all.

love.